April 1, 2009

Knowing when the time is right

Have read two things today that made me feel a little reflective. One was Suldog's post celebrating his grandmother..."Ma". The other was A Vet's Guide to Life's recent post.

I felt moved to respond to Chris's post - but identify hugely with Suldog's too. I just haven't commented there yet

I left this for Chris......
You have captured our vet dilemna perfectly.... and I have been there twice. I have many pets, but only two of them have been really special for me. The ones I truly grieved for. One 16 yr old dog, one younger cat with nephrosis. They both declined slowly, they both required decisions from me - no quick or sudden leaving. I put both of them to sleep at home. Myself. When I was ready. No fear, no stress, and they trusted me to the end.
All I can say - although I agonised over it, and dreaded the day, and grieved in advance, when the time came, there was no problem. All my years of vet training and experience told me when the moment arrived, that this was the last thing I could do, that to continue was selfish on my part, and that I could let them go in this way. I had the knowledge, the power and the ability...and I have never regretted it!
I do feel for you - it never gets easier....
Jenny - our beautiful black labrador x...
Very grainy...


Pickles... our beautiful ginger tabby.


RIP.

I went to look for some decent pictures of Jenny... they are all on real photo paper - been a while now.  I was also hoping to find the "ghost picture" we found - after accidentally running a film through twice and superimposing the shots, of Pickles sitting on his own grave, flowers and all..... was rather spooky at the time!! Anyway - I didn't find it, or any of Jenny that do her real justice.... Instead I found a treasure trove of pictures...boy, Facebook is going to get a hammering... and many many years of nostalgia... from England and primary school, high school in New Zealand, university, marriage, parents, life pre-kids, with kids, the kids, their friends, their dates, our old friends, lots of our various houses, holidays, adventures, birthdays, and the myriad of events that make up all our lives. I feel quite shaky - a potted history of emotion condensed into about 40 minutes of searching! It helps to put today's stresses and worries into some perspective; lives change, people move, kids grow, relationships change, people change, jobs change... and we are still here, still fighting, still growing! What's a bad day now and then!!!

1 comment:

  1. It is sad, you don`t want them to go but their time here with you is finished. When my samoyed had breast cancer so many people hassled me to put her down, she wasn`t ready. I spoke to my vet about it and he said she will tell me. She did, xmas eve she walked to the front door and wanted to leave, it was her time. I kept taking her back to her bed but she was getting stressed. I took her up to the vets and did what she wanted.I promised her I wouldn`t leave her and I stayed with her until the pet cremation place came and picked her up, gosh I loved her and still miss her.
    My andalusian had a brain tumour and was dangerous to be around, the vet made the decision to end his life. When the vet drove into the driveway that morning and he saw her 4WD gosh he freeked, he knew, so did the other horses. It wasn`t his time yet and he fought it hard! very distressing.
    You have made me cry and I haven`t even mentioned my kitten who like your`s came back and visted, to say goodbye.
    Rose

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